Sunday, May 18, 2014

Pictures are more than 1000 words- They can communicate what words cannot, mostly unknowingly.

You know, some day I'll have a different blog. And this one. Or maybe I'll just morph it. But one entirely anonymous would be ideal... For the longest time I've had the feeling that I've been hiding behind a rock- Likely just a congealed chunk of mud, dwindling away with rain. I'm not sure if I like it or not. At the same time, very isolated. But I'm at peace with it now, isolation is the only problem at the moment. I don't know what I'm looking for on this computer of mine, but I'm at the point where pictures make my eyes water. And I don't cry anymore.
That's a brilliant thing. There's a big difference between being moved, and being crushed. It's only been tears of realisation of potential, in a way. Reassurance. Two pictures did it for me. (Well, three, if you count that killer jacket I found online, only to realise it cost 180 pounds and I was much too small for it).
Whenever I have a question I know the answer to, I always need to be reasurred. Cowardice, perhaps. Perhaps I'm just scared. Excited, but scared. But the simplest things reasure me beyond disbelife.
I've decided to write things down now. I cannot go on talking in my head- Running out of space up there.
I can see myself in five years. Not dead, but smiling. It's one of the best things to happen to me in a long time.

No comments:

Post a Comment